Posts Tagged ‘listening’


3D Team Leadership Arrow Concept

Image by lumaxart via Flickr

It’s easy to complain about stuff.  In fact, without trying to hard, you can find something wrong with almost everything.  So, when one stops to think about it, complaining doesn’t take much skill, art, or imagination.  And yet, everyone seems to want to outdo everyone else in their powers of complaint.  Why is this?  What is it about our culture that makes complaining so ubiquitous?  What is it about our lives that make us unable to appreciate the good and instead focus on the negative?

If you are reading this, most likely you live in the United States – the most prosperous and richest nation in the world.  According to some researchers, even the poorest Americans are richer than 99% of the world’s population.  Yet, we still grumble, bitch, and moan.

We attribute our lack of happiness to our employers, our spouses, or our government. We seem to think that if we made more money, had a better job, or had lower taxes, our lives would suddenly become pristine journey’s of joy.  I don’t believe this is true however.  I don’t think higher wages, a better boss, or the perfect government is going to solve your problems.  Indeed, the issues of happiness probably go much deeper than this – and I’m not going to try to address them here.  However, I would like to propose one simple idea that we can all employ to better our home, work, and social lives.

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CPR training

Image via Wikipedia

As I walked into the bedroom, it looked like there was more drama than necessary – more than I cared to deal with on this laconic Thanksgiving Day.  Our 55-year-old female patient was sitting on the floor, propped against her bed.  She was breathing fast and her CO2 levels were down – it looked like an anxiety attack, so I squatted down and tried to convince/coach her to slow her breathing down.  But something didn’t look right.

She was trying to cooperate with me, but there was no way her breathing was slowing down.  It was fast, about 40 respirations a minute, and deep.  Her eyes were closed and I discovered she had some chest pain – which she was unable to describe.  In fact, all of her concentration went into her breathing and I, as with the other medics in the room, were just a distraction.

It was at this point that I got very concerned.

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Don´t shoot me in the face.I think one of my biggest frustrations is when people fail to see the bigger picture.  When a system plays out, just the way it is designed to operate, why do we blame the people who are merely actors in the process?  Why do we shoot the messengers?

For example, there are 30-40 million people in this country without health insurance.  Many of those people are good, respectable individuals who find themselves in a difficult, and possibly temporary, situation.  Others have been raised within a culture of poverty – social, spiritual, cultural, and financial poverty – they don’t know any other way.  It isn’t their fault they are in the situations they find themselves, and they don’t know any other way out.  Why do we blame these victimized people for the using the only system they know?

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